Perhaps it is because I am getting older that I feel more vulnerable to various catastrophes; newly emerging wrinkles and aches and pains won’t let me forget that that years are passing by with alarming speed, and four decades of life experience have stripped the rose-colored tint off the lens through which I view this chaotic world. Upon waking each morning, my mind is flooded with possibilities, the majority of them ranging from unpleasant to nightmarish unfortunately:

Forgotten appointments
Financial struggles
Missed deadlines
Relational conflict
Cancer
Lost library books
Wasted time/energy/money
Freak accidents
Adolescent angst

I’m not a grim person, honest – just an aware one. I can’t listen to the news or log onto the internet without being reminded in a thousand different ways of how much evil, stress and illness is pouring down upon our lives. And what makes it weirder is that these hellish stories are intermixed with celebrity gossip and beauty tips. It’s all kinds of crazy and unpredictable out there.

And yet, in spite of it all, I believe with all my heart that serenity, love, beauty and goodness are accessible at any time, in any circumstance. They must be sought after of course, and we must sacrifice quite a bit to acquire these heavenly attributes, but if we are willing to put in the effort, then authentic, eternal joy can and will override our tendencies toward fear and despair.

Recognizing that each of us is unique in terms of our weaknesses, strengths and backgrounds, I do not assume to know what coping methods would work best for you when it comes to finding peace in the midst of chaos but for what it’s worth, I will share some of mine. May God bless us all with a sustained desire for what is good and profitable for our souls, and the strength to release that which keeps us shackled to earthly cares.

1. There is such a thing as being “too informed”:

Web MD, CNN, My Yahoo Homepage: these are all things I have grounded myself from due to their propensity for working me into a no good, hysterical frenzy. You know those waves the apostle Peter took his gaze off of Christ to ogle at when attempting to walk on water? That’s what news and medical sites are to me. The moment I start fixating, all wide-eyed and slack-jawed, on their up to the minute updates, gruesome details and doomsdayish predictions, I start drowning. It is not naive to protect your brain and heart from an onslaught of sensationalist journalism, only prudent . A “well-informed” yet paralyzed with fear Molly Sabourin is no good to anyone, my precious family most certainly included.

“Stand at the brink of the abyss of despair, and when you see that you cannot bear it anymore, draw back a little and have a cup of tea.”
~ Elder Sophrony of Essex

2. Live in the moment, with Thanksgiving:

I have written about this ad nasuem but I am absolutely convinced that present tense living and gratitude are the keys to all peace, all wisdom, all joy. The following piece from “Life Transfigured: A Journal of Orthodox Nuns,” nails it! If you read nothing else in this post, read the paragraphs below and be comforted, challenged, inspired!

If we as Christians truly believe that our lives are lived under the sign of the Cross and in the light of eternity, then we must believe that God is with us in all the changing fortunes of our days. And we must also believe that despite natural disasters and human ills, evil is not finally triumphant and death is not victorious. In our lives there are no chance events, no irrational twists of empty fate, but rather the ever-present workings of a provident God, Who uses all means to lead us into the harbor of Christ.

When we begin to feel, however faintly, the truth of this, we shall find much to be grateful for. The spirit of thankfulness is a necessary part of the spiritual discipline of living in the present moment – with God – and not in the past or the future. We cannot know what will happen tomorrow, or even tonight; we cannot change what is already past. But we can be grateful today for the blessings of today – the blessing of life itself, the blessing of communion with God through prayer and the Holy Eucharist, the blessing of repentance, the healing of forgiveness. Even the small, seemingly trivial, moments in our day – the sight of a bird in the sky, the greening of a tree, the laugh of a child, the voice of a friend – speak to us of God if only we wish to hear, for everything of beauty, of light, of love, comes to us from Him.

In such small moments, as much as in the dramatic crises of our lives, the headlong rush of time opens upon eternity. If we learn to live quietly, attentively, faithfully, in the “now” which alone truly exists for us, we shall be prepared by degrees for the “everlasting now” which awaits us after death. If we do not find and follow Christ in the present moment, we shall not recognize Him at the end of time.

Let us ask of God a grateful heart, and let us resolve to give thanks each day for the day itself and the presence of Christ in it, sustaining our life by His hand and giving courage to our struggles, zeal to our repentance, contrition to our prayer, and stability to our labors. If only we will make an effort, we will find that giving thanks to God – even in adversity – opens our hearts to see blessings we had not thought to find.

– Life Transfigured: A Journal of Orthodox Nuns, Vol. 24, No. 2, Summer 1991, pp.8-9, produced by The Orthodox Monastery of the Transfiguration, Ellwood City, Pa.

3. Go Offline, and Be Kind and Helpful to the People in My Local Community:

Let’s face it, an excessive amount of social media can incite anxiety, judgey-ness, jealousy, insecurity and terrible un-productivity. Everything in moderation, right? See the problem, or my problem anyway, with Facebook and such is that it reduces whole flesh and blood individuals into mere holders of opinions on hot-button political, social, moral and Theological issues. If we agree with those opinions, they are our “friends”, if we do not, a chasm grows between us that becomes too hard to cross via 40 character rebuttals to their opposing positions. Relating to our “neighbor” in this way falls way short of Christ’s commandments to love, serve, turn the other cheek, etc. These on-line “relationships” are agitating instead of salvific, and discouraging instead of hopeful.

Investing in my community, however, allows me to work with, volunteer with, laugh with, and generally interact with my neighbor as a human being, as opposed to a faceless opinion. By going out of my way to find beauty in that person right in front of me, focusing on where we can connect, and by actively attempting to encourage that person in whatever big or small way I can (a warm smile, a kind word, a listening ear, a helping hand), divine joy spreads virally, and bridges are formed. Stepping outside of myself to uplift someone else always, always brings me peace.

“As Christians we are here to affirm the supreme value of direct sharing, of immediate encounter —not machine to machine, but person to person, face to face.”
—Bishop Kallistos [Ware] “The Mystery of the Human Person”

4. Surrender My Expectations:

The quickest way for me to get frustrated and irritable is by holding tight to my own assumptions about what would be “best” for me. See if I had my own way, I’d never be hurt, or stretched, or humbled, or uncomfortable; my patience would not be tried nor my faith tested. My default desire is ease and gratification, which are temporarily thrilling but not exactly character building. I lack the will power to choose salvation over self-preservation all on my own.

Many, many…many of my best laid plans have been thwarted, and I will admit I did not always handle the disappointment with grace and dignity. In hindsight, however, I can see exactly how those blows to my pride and presumptions were necessary for my spiritual growth, and for my ability to empathize with the struggles of others. As hard and sometimes scary as it is to surrender my longings and expectations to Christ, praying “Thy Will Be Done” with fear and trembling, the letting go brings with it a new realization of how omnipresent God’s compassion is. Viewing whatever befalls me as an opportunity to become ever more long-suffering and merciful allows me to rise-above the fear of failure, interruption or being disdained. Peace is trusting Christ to provide not what I want but what I need, because He loves me.

O Lord, I do not know what to ask of You. You alone know what are my true needs. You love me more than I myself know how to love. Help me to see my real needs which are concealed from me. I do not dare to ask either for a cross or for consolation. I can only wait on You. My heart is open to You. Visit and help me, for the sake of Your great mercy. Strike me and heal me; cast me down and raise me up. I worship in silence Your holy will and Your unsearchable ways. I offer myself as a sacrifice to You. I have no other desire than to fulfill Your will. Teach me to pray. Pray You Yourself in me. Amen.
– Prayer of Metropolitan Philaret of Moscow

5. Pursue Beauty:

And finally, there is beauty – the kind of beauty that brings me to repentance and inspires me to keep on keeping on believing in Light that cannot be extinguished by wordly darkness. True beauty quiets the noise causing my eyes to be blinded and ears deafened to all that is good, noble and pure. I find it in nature, in music, in literature and most especially in the hymns, sacraments and services of the Orthodox Christian Church. I’ve grown more cautious of what I allow to penetrate my fragile being. When I open my mind to depravity, titillation and materialism, they tend to take root and make me feel, well…just plain yucky and dissettled. True beauty is medicinal – very healing.

“i thank you God for most this amazing”
i thank You God for most this amazing
day:for the leaping greenly spirits of trees
and a blue true dream of sky;and for everything
which is natural which is infinite which is yes
(i who have died am alive again today,
and this is the sun’s birthday;this is the birth
day of life and love and wings:and of the gay
great happening illimitably earth)
how should tasting touching hearing seeing
breathing any-lifted from the no
of all nothing-human merely being
doubt unimaginable You?
(now the ears of my ears awake and
now the eyes of my eyes are opened)
— E. E. Cummings

Peace to you all, my brothers and sisters! Stay strong, stay hopeful, stay clinging to Christ!

By Molly Sabourin

The post A Spirit of Peace appeared first on Holistic Christian Life.

Last week my twelve-year-old daughter and I were at the grocery store. While we waited in the check out line I automatically reached for my smart phone and began scrolling through my text messages and emails. I was so completely absorbed in the digital world at my fingertips I failed to notice the elderly woman behind me struggling to get her groceries out of her cart and on to the conveyer belt. It wasn’t until I heard my daughter saying, “Excuse me, can I help you with those?” that my attention was drawn back to the here and now, where my flesh and blood neighbors were shopping, and living and breathing, all around me. I was humbled by my own child’s alertness to a need right in front of us. It was definitely a wake up call, one I’ve been mulling over for the last few days now.

Not making room in my life for moments of stillness and attentiveness affects me negatively.

Numerous medical studies have linked excessive smart phone use with anxiety, depression, difficulty sleeping, poor time management, etc. I have personally found that being distracted by technology and having my mind consumed by news stories, social media feeds, and Netflix shows makes it impossible to find beauty, peace, and opportunities to serve others, in the present moment. It is so important for my physical, spiritual, and emotional health that I regularly recommit myself to incorporating stillness and attentiveness into my day. Below are three tangible ways I am trying to do just that:

1. By Finding Rest In Nature

One of my favorite poems is Wendell Berry’s “The Peace of Wild Things:”

When despair for the world grows in me
and I wake in the night at the least sound
in fear what my life and my children’s lives may be,
I go and lie down where the wood drake
rests in his beauty on the water, and the great
heron feeds.
I come into the peace of wild things
who do not tax their lives with forethought
of grief. I come into the presence of still water.
And I feel above me the day-blind stars
waiting with their light. For a time
I rest in the grace of the world, and am free.

There is something mystically calming about starting my morning slowly and quietly on the porch, actively listening to the peaceful sound of birds chirping. God reveals Himself in nature and making concerted efforts to find Him in the beauty of blooming flowers, sparkling stars, or a breathtaking sunrise, rewards one with an unearthly sense of tranquility. Long leisurely (technology-free) walks in nature should not be considered a luxury but rather essential for mental clarity, physical wellness, emotional stability, and spiritual growth.

2. By Resisting The Urge to Break Out My Smart Phone During Moments of Downtime

It used to be that grocery store check-out lines, doctors’ waiting rooms, and trips to the park with my kids provided regular snippets of stillness in which to day dream, observe my surroundings, strike up a conversation, pray, read, etc. These frequent disengagements from the over-stimulating and stress-inducing noise of news updates and banal entertainment gave my mind and soul a breather. I was much more apt to smile at and make eye contact with others, or to notice ways to be a healing presence to others, when I was free to pay attention to my surroundings. Metropolitan Kallistos Ware reminds us that, “As Christians we are here to affirm the supreme value of direct sharing, of immediate encounter -not machine to machine, but person to person, face to face.” Resisting the impulse to reach for my phone and get lost on-line during moments of downtime enables me to be present for the people God has placed in my path and to listen for His whispered guidance from one minute to the next.

3. By Counting My Blessings

Recently, a dear friend of mine gently reminded me about the power of gratitude. Before going to sleep she tries to pray a brief section of the Akathist of Thanksgiving in order to stay mindful of God’s great love and mercy:

Glory to Thee for calling me into being
Glory to Thee, showing me the beauty of the universe
Glory to Thee, spreading out before me heaven and earth
Like the pages in a book of eternal wisdom
Glory to Thee for Thine eternity in this fleeting world
Glory to Thee for Thy mercies, seen and unseen
Glory to Thee through every sigh of my sorrow
Glory to Thee for every step of my life’s journey
For every moment of glory
Glory to Thee, O God, from age to age
– The Akathist Hymn: “Glory to God For All Things” Ikos 1

Gratitude begets joy and courage, and opens my eyes to blessings I take for granted or ignore when preoccupied with emails, social media, or worries about tomorrow. It is a very powerful tool for keeping me anchored in the now and spiritually observant. Inner stillness is required for relishing in the soothing warmth of a light summer breeze, the curiosity and wonder of a small child, the sweetness of a strawberry, or the taste of heaven offered to each and every one one of us in every uplifting connection we make with a neighbor, a family member, or friend.

It is encouraging to remember we have the power of choice. It only takes a few minutes to pause when I first wake up and ask God to keep me awake and alert to His beauty, grace, and peace in the smallest details of my day. Stillness and attentiveness never fail to enliven my weary heart and quiet my restless soul.

The post Finding Peace In Stillness appeared first on Holistic Christian Life.

As frequent readers of this blog know, I was able to take a vacation earlier this year, and unplugged from technology.  Or, at least, that was the goal.  I didn’t take my computer, but did have my phone.  I was tempted a couple times to turn it on, and had an issue at home to take care of, but all in all…it was off.  And I didn’t miss it.  The only time I wanted to turn it on was when my friends where using theirs.  Isn’t that the way?  You go into a dentist office, and you have no need to take out your phone, but everyone else has their noses in one, so you pull yours out too.

Studies are showing that we get a dopamine reaction which can lead to addiction every time we get an email, text, or result on our devices, and it is an ongoing, and sometimes heated debate if this is also contributing to hormonal disruption, ADD, and memory issues. 

Our world has changed dramatically since the development of the Internet.  A study done back in 2015 by Neilson reported that Americans older than 18 spend a whopping 11 hours a day watching TV, listening to the radio, or using smartphones or other electronic devices.  That shocked me!  And of that time more than 2 hours each day was engaging with social media.  With the damage being done to our bodies (from so much sitting) and relationships, it’s healthy to fast from technology on a regular basis.  Both daily, weekly, and during extended vacations.

A media fast has many healthy benefits

• Fewer cravings: All the ads that we dodge while navigating the internet are actually affecting us.  Especially the food ads. Taking a media break frees us from all of these temptations.
• Better sleep: Especially at night, the blue light exposure from our devices’ screens is similar to the bright midday sun, thus reducing the production of melatonin.  Turning off all electronic devices an hour before bed allows the normal production of melatonin and a better night’s rest which is good for healing and our energy levels.
• More activity: Not sitting on the couch staring at a screen will most likely prompt us to do something else.  An inactive lifestyle is a major contributor to chronic poor health.  Take up a new hobby instead of spending your free time on the computer.  Go outside and garden, or learn to cook, dance, play a musical instrument, or join a book club to meet people.
• Relaxation: Stress from feeling like you need to stay on top of information flowing into your feed constantly saps your attention, time and energy. We could all use a break from all the noise!

So HOW do we “unplug”?  Look at your attention as an asset.  We only have so much of it.  Here are a few ideas to help you get started:

• CHOOSE information sources that will strengthen the mind.  Do you really need all those news sources?  And turn off Push Notifications unless using the app at the time.
• BUDGET your time. Be the information “hunter” and not the “hunted”. How did I go from reading about the storm developing near Florida this morning to an article about a motorcycle rider dodging melons that fell out of a truck?!  Stay on task!
• Put your phone on AIRPLANE mode during mealtimes. Scanning the news during meals creates stress and is not good for digestion!  Enjoy conversation with those dining with you or simply savor the sounds of nature and the flavors of the food with no distractions.
• Go for an ENTIRE EVENING and a mini-retreat from technology and play an old-fashioned board game with friends or family, or read that novel you have had on your to-do list.
• At the very least, find at least 15 MINUTES every day to enjoy peace and quiet. Be with your thoughts, meditate, pray, or journal.
• And this is important:  TURN OFF your phone at night or at least have it on airplane mode.  We do not need all of those EMFs bouncing around us at night while our bodies regenerate and detoxify.

Success is achieved with patience.  As you learn to let go of technology maybe you will even be led to an entire WEEKEND RETREAT of no media.  I know that is a big step, but imagine how rested and clear-headed we would all be after a refreshing media detox!  I definitely felt better after my vacation, and I know it wasn’t just due to the sunshine!

Another great way to unplug is to be with friends and family.  I know that I have had great plans to give parties and entertain, for instance, after returning from cooking school in Italy, the plan was to hold an “Evening in Tuscany” complete with opera singers.  That was in 2012 I believe, and still not done.  For the couple occasions I have managed, my favorite way to invite people is by using Paperless Post.  I just think they have a very classy way of presenting the invite via email, so I thought I’d share this resource. 

The post Unplugging and Your Health appeared first on Holistic Christian Life.

Establishing Peace With One Another

A Guest Post by Molly Sabourin from her blog “Grace Here And Now” on Ancient Faith Blogs

Like most other times a fast approaches, my initial thoughts about this Nativity Fast were laced with stress: “I’m not ready!”

Truth be told, I’ve been wrestling with a lot of disappointment lately, in my own failings and in the state of our nation. I’ve been discouraged, disillusioned, and downright depressed over the dwindling love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control in our angry, frightened country.

People are suffering and scared and we are screaming at one another with accusations and assumptions that are cruel, sarcastic, and sweeping. We are demonizing our neighbors, vomiting up harsh and piercing words, spreading hate like a disease. Division and discrimination are flourishing in this poisonous climate of seething vitriol and enflamed passions.

I can’t make sense anymore of “righteous indignation” at the expense of gentleness and mercy. I once carried pat answers in my back pocket to common difficult life questions. I thought I had a handle on things, Christianity-wise, but now I realize I comprehend very, very little about the mysterious ways of God.

So that’s a plus, I suppose. I’ve been humbled. I’ve given up thinking, judging, generating opinions and trying to figure stuff out. I’m starting from scratch, and simplifying, hoping to advance to a more childlike faith in Christ. Prayer and compassion are my only compass. “If we are quiet it will become clear and we will know what we are each meant to do,” my wise friend reassured me the other day.

“Help me rise above,” I’ve been begging of Christ. “Help me transcend earthly cares and rationales.”

So this fast, here it comes on the heels of a toxic election and yes, it seems daunting, but still I find myself weeping over the grace of it all. I’m so tired, so fragile, and here is a gift placed in my lap that can heal my broken spirit.

“Approach it with joy!” my priest friend told me. Repentance and quiet, self-restraint and more prayer, are exactly what I need! And humility, I need that too. And bridge building acts of unconditional service that soften my heart, dampen those enflamed passions, and help me see Christ in literally everyone, especially my enemies and those who are different from me because that’s where the rubber meets the road and the demons are confounded.

His ways are not our ways.

His ways move mountains and raise the dead.

I listened to a homily this morning by Fr. Antony Hughes at St. Mary’s Orthodox Church in Cambridge, MA. It was titled, “A Revolution of Love” and boy did it refresh my weary soul. How can we be salt and light in this rapidly changing and disturbingly discordant social environment?

Fr. Antony reminded me it will require, yes, love, but not just any kind of love, not imperfect and limited self-manufactured love, rather the extreme sacrificial Kingdom of Heaven kind of love that can miraculously flow through us if we empty ourselves of pride. He said:

Our response to hatred must always be love. “When they go low, we go high” is a beautiful Christian sentiment. “They” means anyone who hates and acts out on it. “We” means those who follow Christ. This is not a political statement. Folks, we need to talk with one another and care for one another. Jesus overcame the world by going high that is by humility. We must go high, very high, as high as humanly possible and when we reach the limits we can reach we must ask God to give us the power to go even higher. “Greater love has no man than this that he lay down his life for a friend.” Yes, perhaps, even that… No propaganda. Only Truth. No hatred. Only love. No violence. Only Peace. No bigotry. Only Tolerance. We desperately need to foment a revolution of love… So, I ask you please. Do not let anger and hatred rule you. Stay vigilant. Help and do not hurt.

I am thankful for this communal season of laying aside busyness and distractions that we might focus on the mind-blowing truth of God becoming man that we in turn might unite ourselves to God and become partakers of His divine nature. I couldn’t do it on my own. May increased prayer, fasting, stillness, and almsgiving help us to more fervently love God, and our neighbor, and fill us to overflowing with restorative peace, benevolence, and hope! We need it now more than ever!

Holding fast to the law of love, let us embrace the intent of brotherly love, establishing peace one with another, and oneness of mind; for Christ, the Giver of peace, is coming, bringing peace to all. (Canon of Compline of the Forefeast, December 22, eighth ode)—

The post Establishing Peace With One Another appeared first on Holistic Christian Life.

Last weekend I, and everyone else in NW Indiana, went to Hobby Lobby. My oldest (and much craftier than me) daughter likes to make homemade Christmas gifts for family members and approximately 35 of her closest friends so we have to start the process early, lest we find ourselves up till 1:00 am Modge Podging and glitter gluing on the eve of her winter break from school.

The aisles were packed with people who had similar ideas about getting a jumpstart on holiday planning. Carts were overflowing with winter wreaths, felted snowmen and all manner of sparkly ribbon. You could smell the excitement, fake pine scent, and yes, already, just a touch of stress in the air.

Thanks to Pinterest, HGTV and Better Homes and Gardens, the message we receive loud and clear when it comes to celebrating Christmas is “go big or go home.”

Wait…what’s that? Are you telling me you haven’t ordered Christmas cards or finished your homemade Jesse Tree and Advent Calendar? You haven’t been collecting festive gluten-free cookie recipes, or stocking your gift closet with thoughtful presents for your loved ones throughout the year? You say you are already struggling to stay on top of normal everyday demands and break out into a cold sweat when you think about all that’s required to create a “perfect Christmas?”

Well, welcome to my reality! Read on!

This year, my 40^th year, has been my year of restraint. This year I’ve been learning the value of healthy boundaries and simplification. Excessive multi-tasking, over sharing and over comparing, and high expectation setting are all habits I’ve been prayerfully weeding from the proverbial garden of my soul. My access to peace is dependent on stillness and attentiveness, attributes impossible to attain, it turns out, when my mind is buzzing with too much noisy stimuli.

This advent, instead of aiming too high then burning myself out, I’m going for small, consistent and quiet, leaning on the Church to keep my priorities straight by way of attending Her services, singing Her hymns and participating in Her sacraments. This season, instead of looking outward at how everyone else is doing Christmas, I’m striving to keep my focus fixed firmly on Jesus, approaching the manger like a lowly shepherd with nothing to offer but repentance and awe.

My family and I will snuggle up with our own unique traditions as we await the birth of Christ, traditions just right for us involving treats for neighbors, Charles Dickens’s Christmas Carol, readings from Meditations for Advent, shoes filled with chocolates and candy canes from St. Nicholas, the hanging of beloved and nostalgic tree ornaments. None of these will require a lot of money or sewing skills, neither will they be featured on style or parenting blogs but I’m fine with that, really…finally.

This advent, instead of beating myself up over not doing more, I plan on decidedly choosing less – less fighting the crowds at shopping malls and box stores, less of stuffing my already full schedule with additional projects and commitments, less rushing, less pining for material possessions, less wasting my time and energy browsing the internet for cool Christmas ideas only to become overwhelmed and dissatisfied, less forgetting to be still, grateful, joyful.

Advent is such a precious gift to all of us who are tired, uber-aware of our own unworthiness, and aching for a reprieve from worldly pressures. “Come,” this season of preparation calls to us, “lay aside your busyness, passions and distractions, and reflect on the Mystery of  the Incarnation. Allow it to sustain you, define you, and fill you with Light, and compassion for your neighbor.”

The Church’s invitation to prepare for the Nativity is above all a command to us to open the gates of repentance, that Christ may enter our very being and be born anew in our hearts, and to offer our virtues to the newborn king. Instead of gold, we offer charity; instead of frankincense, prayer, instead of myrrh, repentance. Then, like the song of the angels and the adoration of the shepherds, our worship will be pure and our love without pretense.

Vassilios Papavassiliou, Meditations for Advent

The post On Pacing Myself Through Advent appeared first on Holistic Christian Life.